I haven't forgotten about this little space of the world I carved out for myself 8 years ago. It may be a little neglected lately but it still speaks to my heart and serves as a snapshot of a very difficult period of my life that I walked through. More importantly, it was a way to connect to all of you who have followed along with our journey, as I worked to rebuild a life that was turned upside down. I haven't forgotten any of you! Your support, whether it started day one or you're just now finding us, has meant everything. I've often hesitated to put myself out there with my writing, but each time I got nervous hitting the 'publish' button, you always responded with graciousness and kind words. It's been so uplifting to feel supported by all of you, truly an integral part of my healing process.
I'm obviously not writing much here anymore, but it doesn't mean that I'm not still writing! I've been writing pretty frequently, still processing everything I walked through these past eight years. And news flash, still unpacking unresolved feelings and realizations. It's been really cathartic and has given me a clearer vision for my future. I hope to be able to share the nitty gritty details of all that I didn't share here with you all, someday. I have more story to tell and hopefully more truth, love and beauty to share with the world. Connection to each other is the real inspiration here, and no matter how we do it, via the internet or in person, it can all be meaningful and real. Elena is my inspiration in life and it gives me true joy and continued healing to be able to share her with you.
Awhile back, a friend from college reached out to me asking if I would be interested in interviewing with her on her (and her friends') podcast. I immediately said yes, but acknowledged flutters of doubt and fear over actually speaking publicly. I much prefer to write, purging all my feeling and thoughts in print where I feel I'm best (and more comfortable) at articulating. As the interview neared, my fear and doubts in ability and qualifications threatened to consume me. I prayed for peace and confidence but when Emily showed up at my door step a couple weeks ago, I was admittedly terrified. Fortunately, I knew her and she's always been genuine, warm and thoughtful, therefore I trusted her. My hands may have been shaking the entire interview, but once it was done, I felt more than relief. I felt a deep, deep gratitude. I realized that no one, for the most part, had ever asked me deep, meaningful questions outside of what actually happened to Elena. I was so fulfilled being able to share my journey of discovery and healing, rather than the devastation of her injury. Emily's questions were gentle, yet purposeful and deep, which I truly appreciated. I had stepped entirely out of my comfort zone, but on the other side I found it wasn't so scary, another learned lesson to tuck away.
For those of you who have already listened to the interview and responded to me, gosh, thank you. I was terrified the morning it came out, and you all made me feel, once again, supported and appreciated. It is tough to put yourself out there, and to be met with your sweet messages of encouragement, appreciation and connection, in turn, makes it all worthwhile.
As Emily said, we both believe strongly in the power of sharing our stories with others. I still believe in that power, and this most certainly confirmed that. There is power in overcoming fear, speaking your truth, and making a small ripple of hope and encouragement in an often times, hopeless world.
Share on, friends. And I will too.
You can listen to my interview with Emily from The Illuminate Podcast by clicking HERE. I'd encourage you to listen to some of their other interviews, which are equally inspiring (hence my feelings of under-qualification!). Love you, friends.
